Author: Sean Parsons

He was the family bread winner!

There was the time a friend of mine decided to include my thesaurus in a raffle without asking me first.
I was at a loss for words.

So we are getting ready for our annual craft show and raffle. This is our big Summer fundraiser. The Raffle will begin on August 13th along with our craft show and will be drawn on Labor Day. We are looking for people that would be interested in donating baskets. All of the proceeds will go to our patient care fund. If you are interested please let us know.

Continue reading I remember when my Dad won a baguette in a raffle.

Not to be confused with Peter Piper or a tongue twisted wood chuck, our opening questioning is prepping you for a poll on our 98 year old vintage soda fountain! Charlie Scott and Art Passante have done a tremendous job of restoring our fountain so that our soda jerks (Bev, Tammy, Deb, Jacob, Emenet, and Sasha) can actually jerk soda fountain heads. That is how the job title of soda jerk came about, because of the jerking motion they made when using the soda fountain. For the time being we have club soda on the head to the furthest right, we will have water on the middle head (it is only designed for water and can not produce a carbonated beverage), and that leaves us with the head on the left. Do we use a cola or root beer? Root beer has the obvious joy of creating frothy floats and maybe even an option for a bottomless root beer float! On the other hand, having cola on that head opens up options for cherry colas, vanilla colas, chocolate colas, etc. While we wait for the results, you should come in and order a vanilla soda, a cherry soda, a chocolate egg cream, or whatever else using the club soda on our fountain along with whatever syrups you want us to add.

When the guy running the store gives you a high four.

Continue reading How do you know if you’ve bought good fireworks?

Punnsylvanians!

So our Fourth of July celebration is coming up and it means I need to inundate you with bad jokes related to Independence Day!

Continue reading Which colonists told the most jokes?

Why was the teacher cross-eyed on the last day of school?
She lost control of her pupils.
Apparently her and the students had a hard time seeing eye to eye.

Continue reading School’s Out!

We just finished celebrating Memorial Day and now we are getting ready for our anniversary event. Memorial Day was fantastic with the parade coming past our store and a level of pride could be seen in our community as everyone watched the participants. During the parade I overheard a kid’s question to his mother, “Mom, do soldiers ever go to heaven?”. “Of course they do!” protested his mother. “What makes you ask?” “There are so many soldiers with beards but I never saw any pictures of angels with beards.” he replied. The mother responded “Oh, that’s because most vets who go to Heaven get there by a close shave.”

Continue reading Sixth Anniversary Extravaganza

A small boy was staring at the names on the wall of an old church when the pastor noticed him. “What are you looking at?” asked the clergyman. “All those names. Who are they?” the boy asked. The pastor nodded, and said, “They are the reason we have Memorial Day. They are those who died in the service.” The little boy considered that, then asked quietly, “The 9 o’clock service or the 11 o’clock?”
Continue reading Memorial Day is coming

When I was growing up I had musicians, like Axl Rose, singing sweet lullabies with lyrics that included, “Welcome to the jungle, we got fun and games.” Unfortunately now that I’m older, I realize that the jungle is full of cheetahs.

Continue reading Welcome to the jungle…

So last week, when we mentioned our need for sufficient funds to replace our printer, you guys came through. It was amazing how quickly everyone helped out. We have already ordered the new printer and it arrived today. The generosity of everyone is so great that it reminds me of a conversation I had with my wife the other day.

Continue reading If being awesome was a crime, you’d be serving a life sentence.

Or what it actually needs is a new printer.

After several hundred thousand print jobs we need to retire our main printer back in the pharmacy. This morning when I came in I kept hearing music coming from the printer. Eventually I realized it was because the paper was jamming. Then I noticed a flashing message on the printer. It read, “Just Can’t Get Enough.” Apparently it was in Depeche Mode

Continue reading Baby needs a new pair of a shoes!