…but I can’t read music, so I don’t know what it says.
So Shannon and I have a piano. The other day Shannon came downstairs to find out what the raucous was all about. She found me banging my head off the piano.
“What are you doing?”, asked Shan in a worried tone.
“I’m trying to play by ear.”, was my response.
While you are at the Mission Point your engineer starts looking through old archives on various technical specs to see how the Zhian handled a myriad of technology challenges when your engineer stumbles across something that he doesn’t believe is supposed to be there. It’s written in an ancient dialect of Zhian. He ends up being curious enough about it that he starts feeding the universal translator other examples of this dialect till it is capable of translating it into something your engineer understands. This archive includes all kinds of interesting history that he has never heard about before including the insinuation that the Zhian used to have colonies on other planets, the idea that they had a super weapon whose name simply translates into ‘Death Ray’ and most interesting to your engineer, are some old designs for a ship engine that worked on completely different principles than modern FTL drives. It folds space and relies a lot on unproven quantum mechanic theories to simply help you jump from one point in space to another. Your engineer also realizes that for about 1,000 credits he can probably get the parts here on Zhian Prime to build one for your ship.
If you build the Skip Drive, grab the appropriate piece to install it on your ship. It does require an armed marker to activate it and then roll a d20 to see what spawn point you end up at. If the specific spawn point is not out, appear at the spawn point with the closest number always going to the higher number if two numbers have equal difference from the number rolled. Example, you roll a 17 but that spawn point has not come out yet. The closest numbers in play are 15 and 19 which both are only two away from the number rolled. You are required to go to the higher number, 19. If a 20 is rolled you may choose any space already revealed on the board even if it doesn’t contain a spawn point.
After any player has had the option of building a Skip Drive, the archive that this information was found in mysteriously disappears and no one else will have the opportunity to try and build a Skip Drive.
As you look out your ship’s view port at the vast emptiness of Lost Space, at first you assume it is devoid of anything else. Then, to your surprise, you notice what looks like a derelict ship silently floating in the distance. Further scans reveal dozens of people on board but in cryosleep and the name on the hull of the vessel is SS Loathsome.
“Wade, what do we know about a vessel with the call sign SS Loathsome?”
“According to our ship’s database the Loathsome was launched over a century ago from Loath when it was still a prison colony.” Wade continues scanning down his screen. “According to this, it looks like these were the criminals that their jailers thought were so dangerous that they were afraid to even have them around for hard mining labor. Unfortunately for the jailers, some of these prisoners had already set the groundwork for the colony to be overthrown.”
Now what do you do? Your options are thus:
Clarifications: When towing another ship, cut movement in half rounded down, and the ship being towed is in an adjacent space to your ship. Another player could come and attack and destroy the SS Loathsome while you are towing it.
“Captain, there’s an all bands communique coming in from Zhian Prime.”, your comm officer reports.
“Put it on.”
“Aye sir.”
A brief sound of static and then the transmission is coming over the comm loud and clear along with a visual on the view screen…
“We are of the First Order of the Zholar Temple.”, bellowed a Zhian wearing some sort of dark ceremonial robes. “We have worked tirelessly to help fulfill the prophecies and now we are ready to release the Space Kraken.”
Then, the view screen cuts away to reveal an image of Xia. At first it is nearly blindingly bright, but as the camera adjusts, you see…something. An immense creature with tentacles that appears to be exiting the star.
Projected into everyone’s head is a dark and sonorous voice that must be connected to this new creature. No, new can’t be right as you inherently know it must be immensely old.
“Rip, tear, shred!”
Accompanying this thought is an intense dark hunger that is nearly indescribable.
“Rip, tear, shred!”
One of your crewmen falls to their knees and starts vomiting.
“Rip, tear, shred!”
Your vision is growing hazy like you’re going to pass out, and just before you start to lose consciousness, the voice fades away and you regain some modicum of composure. Someone needs to stop this creature, but how?
Your view screen cuts back to the Zhian in ceremonial garb. “Many of you have already heard and felt its hunger. It will, in time, destroy this galaxy and purify us for whatever form Zholar chooses to give us next, but know that those of us in the First Order will be given an honored position.” The screen fades to black and you take a moment to blink and try to suss out what the big lizard was talking about.
“Sir, we’re getting another communique from Zhian Prime but this one is text only.”
You simply nod at the comm officer and he reads aloud, “‘The First Order of the Zholar Temple is a fringe group and a doomsday cult. They do not reflect the views and values of our government or of the people of Zhian Prime as a whole. As we try to apprehend those responsible for this heinous act, we beg all sentient species to try and work against this abomination.’…..That’s all they wrote, sir.”
This Space Kraken has a maximum of 50 damage that it can endure. It will start in the center of Xia, and it will move 1d4 after each player’s turn. NPC’s do not trigger its movement. It will fly the shortest route between its current location and whatever sector number was rolled this round (each round, a new sector number is rolled). If a 20 is rolled it will move towards Nyr. It will avoid going through Asteroids and Debris fields. Any ships that are within any adjacent space during the Kraken’s turn, will lose 1d6 power and heal the Kraken that much.
If there is a planet in that sector that was rolled it will seek to land on that planet and destroy it. Initial contact with the planetary shield will heal the Space Kraken 1d20 and then the shield will fail. Each turn that it sits on a planet it will do 1d6 damage as it burrows into the planet’s core. If it causes 20 damage to the core the planet becomes destroyed and is no longer habitable. On the next turn if a new sector is rolled it will abandon its current objective and move towards it.
Distribute 4 Fame Points, if defeated, as follows: three of the fame points should be divided amongst all ships that contributed (rounded up) and an additional 1FP for the killing blow. The Rikishi event can destroy the Kraken and an ice comet can cause 1d4 +1d6+1d8+1d12+1d20 damage and permanently removes that ice comet from the game, however, no one receives fame points if a natural event destroys the Space Kraken.
Clarifications: Its draining effect does not affect any energy rods you have stored on board. Other NPCs do not turn their attention to this new threat unless someone pays the SellSword to do so or the Space Kraken has actually caused them direct damage to their ship by draining energy from them, or the Avenger will join the fray as well if a Neutral planet is destroyed by the Space Kraken.
They are okay, the injuries were superfishoil.
As many of you are aware, we have been treated poorly by a Pharmacy Benefit Manager, but thanks to everyone that has been stepping up to help, it looks like our injuries from them may also be superfishoil.
We are grateful for the ongoing opportunity to be ‘pillers’ of our community.
Continue reading Did you hear about the pharmacist who got hit with a bottle of omega 3?
For awhile now, I’ve been trying to think in terms of metric. As an example I am 1.85 meters tall and weigh about 80 kilograms. Of course thinking in terms of metric can some times seem a little odd. As an example I was thinking the other day about greedy people.
If you give them 2.54 centimeters, they’ll take 1.60934 kilometers.
I went to a sea food market the other day and found them to be greedy…
After all, everything they do is sell fish.
Maybe I’m just not keeping up with the times. I remember when air was free at the gas stations, and now you have to pay for it. You know why?
Inflation.
Use an internal combustion engine.
So on my way into work today I found myself pondering, ‘What do you call a dinosaur car accident?’
A tyrannosaurus wreck!
So I’ve decided to go really old school this week and tell dinosaur jokes.
Three dinosaurs are running across the desert when they stumble upon a magic lamp. They rub it, and a genie appears.
“I have three wishes, so I’ll give one to each of you,” the genie announces.
The first dinosaur thinks hard. “Alright,” he says, “I’ll have a big, juicy, piece of meat.”
Instantly, the biggest, juiciest piece of meat he’d ever seen appears in front of him.
Not to be outdone, the second dinosaur thinks even harder. “I know! I’ll have a shower of meat!”
Immediately, huge pieces of meat rain down around him.
So our up coming movie is about running, but I know I’ve been miserable the past couple of days with a cold exacerbated by allergies which means my nose has also been running!
When I first met Shannon, and even after we were married, I ran a lot. Once, as a farce, I asked Shannon, “What do you love most about me? My tremendous athletic ability or my superior intellect?”.
Shannon tactfully responded, “What I love most about you, is your running sense of humor.”
Did you hear about the marathon runner who ran for three hours but only moved two feet?
He only had two feet!
I was recently considering getting back into running, so I checked out a gym that had some mediocre new running machines. I thought they were pretty ‘run of the mill’.
…it would probably be Labor Day Weekend.
The above picture is actually of the Boulevard of the Allies back in 1930. I think those same cars are still stuck in traffic there!
We have lot’s coming up in the next few days including a LEGO contest, a raffle drawing, and a Labor Day cookout!
Of course Labor Day reminds me of an old joke about someone that struggled to find how they should spend their days laboring. The following is their first person report:
As a young man
Continue reading If all the cars in the United States were placed end to end…
After an email honoring cats two weeks ago, a lot of pressure was placed on me to talk about dogs this week. Having owned a couple of dogs throughout my life, I decided this task shouldn’t be too ruff.
Growing up I got a dog that was missing a leg from an animal shelter. I have occasionally wondered, ‘where do you find a dog with no legs?’
Then, I had an epiphany. It would be wherever you left him.
Unimaginatively, I called my three legged dog Three. So what would you call a dog with no legs?
It doesn’t matter, he won’t come to you anyway.
I always assumed that dogs had to be bad dancers because most of them had two left feet. Then, I saw this video: